New Guy.. oppsss

Okies... b4 this mak call inform she did gave my phone number to this one guy. Dari kampung. I dont mind la. As far yg mak tau, aku sekarang ni alone.. takde bf. Aku saja je tipu sbb tak nak dia n ayah mengharap. So better dia tahu aku sorang2 now.

Bila this guy call, aku jawab la. Mulanya dia kata aku garang. Erm.. bukan garang sepatutnya bunyinya tegas. Ye la, aku tanya banyak. So dia kata kalau at that time masa dia on the phone dengan aku tu, kalau dia tgh interview keje. Alamatnya dia failed la. :)

Dia ada fb and we exchange account fb. Ekeke.. he is not handsome at all. Tapi the way he talk to me, cam nice person. And aku pun, cantik ke nak org lawa2? hehe. So i tak kisah. Selagi org to being nice to me, i'll act the same way.

So my relationship with my bf, i just put on hold. Until Feb 2012. Dia susah sangat nak bg dateline kan. So this time, aku da sampai ke ujung kesabaran kot. Apa yang dia buat aku untuk for the past 2 years. Mak ayah aku yg sedih tgk aku. Segalanya akan terbongkar Feb 2012. InsyaAllah. For the time being, aku buat biasa dulu. Study aku ada 4 bulan je lagi. Aku akan tgu habis dulu, then will reveal everything. I call the day is D day.

Aku bukan la jahat sangat, but if i do polling site, ask everyone to vote apa yg i buat ni betul ke tak. I bet kalau ada 1000 voters. 999 agreed with me and 1 against. Yang against tu shud be my bf la.

Last nite im soo tired, so i did not do anything. Just sleep, and wake up at 330am to solat. Then i read sms from the new guy. Let me call him "Bak".

Bak : Esok @ 6am i check in ( Kerja dia kat laut )
Me : Ok.. hati2 tau.

Actually, the moment i read the sms, i sedih. Erm.. agak pelik. But i tend to ignore dulu. Baru sembang 3 kali, dah kecoh aku nak feel empty bagai kan. So i just diamkan diri and sent him sms hati2 tu.

This morning i get nasi lemak for my breakfast. :) Semalam aku langsung tak lalu makan. So today.. i just feel released. Y? i also donno y la.. :)

My 1st day

Yesterday was actually my 1st day i started my class. Ermm so tired maaa... but its ok. I hope to finish my study soon.. InsyaAllah. Moga dipermudahkan oleh Nya. My best fren came to Kl. So we just lepaking at our fav coffee house. @ 10 i hd dinner.. sambil minum2 coffee, we just gossiping bout her and mines. Telling each other perkembangan semasa. Maklum be4 we used to share almost every single story. So now, bcoz she's not in KL so when we met, gossip sampai tak sedar semua org disekeliling. Not enough story2 @ coffee house, we cont at my house.

I was about to sleep when our friend called. Actually she called my friend ni. So i just heard. From the facial expression of my best friend ni, mcm tak best. Hati berdegup kencang. @ the coffee house tadi, we did gossiping bout this fren also. I named her as S. S said she found that her current bf hd another girlfren. WTF!!! Jantan ni memang sial. Huh.. masa nak usha S, mcm2 dia usaha ye. At the first place S did not want to be Jantan sial ni nyer gf pun. She said that she is not ready yet. Then my fren asked S how she khow bout this other gf? She said she was read bf's sms. Huhu... And her bf is still sleep in her house. Kalau aku, dah suh Jantan tu blah.. wuaaaa.. Sial sangat. So today mood i nak maki dia puas2.

So pity of S. Ermm... but i just dont know y i feel so hurt. Ermm then i know, it is because i put myself on her shoes. What if my bf yg sengal tu do the same things to me. Of course i lagi takut compared to S. It is coz my bf i far away from me. He can do anything la kat belakang me. I used to check his handphone dulu2, altho i dont smell anything yg pelik2, but when come to think back. Boleh je he deleted all the suspicious sms before met me pun kan. Terus i plak cannot sleep. Very The Emo la plak semalam...huhu.. Ya Allah, hope anything goes well for me.. Amin.

Note : Hope everything goes well today.. InsyaAllah

Call from mom

Yesterday punyala bz.. all the way to my fren's open houses. Makan punya la BANYAK... huhu. So today terus puasa balik. Semalam jugak got a called from mak.

- Mak ada bagi no telefon pada one guy ni, dia nak kenalan dengan awak. Ayah pesan, kalau that guy call, cakap baik2.

Aku ya kan je. Ermm.. Mak and ayah da tak harapkan my bf pun. Aku tau mereka da tanak layan pun mamat ni a.k.a my bf yang lembab ni. So do i pun. Just i dont have any choice now. Aku tau mak n ayah nak sangat aku kawin cepat memandangkan my brother nak kawin bulan 7 tahun depan. Huhu... I feel sad but maybe tu jodoh adik. So i have to accept it.

Untill today, takde panggilan telefon lagi. Aku berdebar. Dalam hati mintak jgn ada call tu. My bf mcm biasa just texting me.. saying that he love me.he miss me.. Just that.. No action nak lebih dari tu. He did not know that aku da tawar hati, family aku da tak ska dia.. Ermm ntah apa la nak jadi ngan bf aku tu. Entahla.

Last week jugak, my so called "friend" suh aku tinggal my bf. Katanya tak de guna tunggu. Dia tak tahu ke selama ni i open my heart pun. Tak de nya aku tgu my bf semata. Huh.. manusia ni pelik. She got prob with his bf, then wanna interfere in my relationship. Perasan bagus pun ye. You just care bout ur relationship, mind our own biz la. Huh.

Hati tenang

Last raya, Alhamdulillah, hati aku tenang, just kekadang tersentuh juga hati. When i saw my cousins with their family, kids all.. :) Tapi, sabar je la. My raya is great la. maybe because adik i turut beraya this year. Da lama she beraya di overseas.

My bf sms me.. asking what im doing.. when...where.. ( and i just replied what he asked, no further question to ask him) No mood to sms him. He just care bout his family. So i dont want to interfere. My cousin ask about my relationship again. And i just said that : Biarla masa yang menentukan, everyday i doa, i solat hajat minta yang terbaik. Allah maha kaya. And apa yang aku kata tu memang dr hati aku. Aku rasa tenang skit berbanding dulu. This raya also i hv no tensed. May be sbb i tak tunggu sesiapa, I dont ever invite my bf dtg rumah pun. Pedulila dia nak beraya mana pun. I know he has relative kat my hometown ni. But i dont even asked pun whether dia dtg sini or not.

Third Raya kot, he sms me. frustrated, his car was excident. Not him. Just car. Someone hit the car. kesian tu kesian jugak. But i think that is his punishment coz make me sad always. :) Jahat kan me.. tapi i just think that. He said his raya so suck.. then i remember my last raya is suck bacause of him. So this time maybe his time to felt what i felt last raya.

I balik Kl and i baik kg pun i never tell him. When he asked, i already arrived at my destination. Donwanna be too attached to him da.. im afraid of feel that i need him so much. Just wanna be cool. Relationship between me and him.. let it go with the flow. If Allah dah tentukan jodoh ku dengan nya. Aku terima. If not, pun aku terima dengan hati terbuka.